if u have been a frequent here @ funk-o-meter, i guess you pretty much have read the entry about my views on marriage in relation to chocolates. yes. DAT one.
++++
my cousin got married a few weeks back and when a bunch a of makciks (aunties) get together, there'll be lots of gossips. amongst them would be their favourite topic of guessing who Saidah is dating (they ALWAYS think i'm dating some random teacher's son. weird la). Or when is Saidah's turn?
and it gets more frustrating when my cousin always have stupid add-on remarks like "she? marriage? pls lahhh... ceh!" or "haha. no boyfriend wad marriage?"or his most favourite one "of course lah. market value drop oredi."
actually dat ass meant well. he wanted me to leave my past first, get on with studies and do well. and he likes to end off our conversation with "...keep your brother's words close to your heart."
i remember talking to my late brother's going-to-be-fiancee-but-didnt-make-it (who's married with one FAT cute baby girl, alesha). bluntly, i asked her if she still loves my brother. and when i looked up, her eyes had gone all teary. well, she had to end a 6 year relationship just like dat. it must've been really hard on her. i dun blame her for not answering me. the answer was darn obvious.
we seldom meet nowadays. we're both too busy. besides, i didnt really wanna meet her. it pained me when the husband actually resembled my brother in more than 2 ways - yes. i'm observant. it pained me seeing her with another guy. i've always seen her with my brother. it felt weird la. i noe you guys smell jealousy. it stinks ryte?
but one thing's for sure, it's hard to fall out of love when you've put so much into building it. it takes time, courage and willpower.
i've fallen out of it. now, when will i fall back in?