there have been moments of time when
i have been completely exasperated,
not with anyone or anything in particular,
but with myself.
with my innate capability to screw up a good thing,
to say the wrong things at the wrong time,
to do something that is apparently illogical to others and
to hurt people unknowingly with said actions.

but there have also been times when i wonder
if it is really my fault for being a tad upset,
or angry even at others, feel hurt by other people’s words and
actions and perhaps, even disappointed by people around me.
but those times don’t really last and ultimately i’ll point the finger at myself.

i wonder how long i can keep on doing this. i really do.

nonetheless, i’ll keep on trying because i’ve never been good at this.